Working on the second gin and tonic

[petronia]

No wait I've got it now it's Rukia who is trapped in the closet, Rukia DO YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE

okay okay

So okay RUKIA is married to RENJI but she has a one night stand with Ichigo and the next morning she has to hide in Ichigo's closet when Orihime comes home but the hollowkeitai gives her away and Orihime is upset and dramatically reveals that she was having a lesbian affair with TATSUKI upon which Rukia sneaks back home but on the way back is pulled over and ticketed by URAHARA for improper gigai usage, basically it is not her day because after she makes it with Renji she finds a condom in the bed (?!?) and Renji breaks down and confesses he knows this guy Chad who knows this chick Tatsuki who is chill with this other chick Orihime who is married to Ichigo with whom he went to high school, and Ichigo introduced him to Urahara and that's how they came to be having an affair. Renji and Rukia make up but Urahara comes back thinking there was a break-in and there is a tussle and Byakuya walks in and accidentally gets shot, and then Kira comes to the door with a spatula so Urahara goes back to his wife Yoruichi only to discover she'd been cheating on him with this midget Soi Fong who is hiding in the closet.

...Okay is it just me or does that make more sense than it should. *leaves fandom preemptively*

Comments

[one-if-by-land.livejournal.com]

I, um.

[woodburner.livejournal.com]

OH DEAR GOD.

I think this is the first post you've ever made that just utterly broke my brain.

[woodburner.livejournal.com]

oh and it didn't help that when I first saw it all it said was "No wait I've got it now it's Rukia who is trapped in the closet, Rukia DO YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE"

[petronia.livejournal.com]

Rukia = R. Kelly of Bleach fanon. Y/N?

[petronia.livejournal.com]

Ahaha um I may have been on about this since fabulous_papaya's comment thread this morning. XD;

[vonbrigthi.livejournal.com]

Sadly when I first saw "Kira" for some reason I thought of Death Note's Kira, and then AUGH the pain was worse.

Ok ok, the first bit makes a lot of sense (...), but it exploded the universe when Urahara came back into play and everything after that and.

*draws you a dj* But it would have to be like, in the style of I dunno, Hot Gimmick or something.

MIDGET.

[one-if-by-land.livejournal.com]

What, in that she like underage ass and is superbly good at the "bump & grind"? OH GOD, SABINA.

[petronia.livejournal.com]

ICHIGO IS UNDERAGE

Also I have read so much pr0n with Rukia molesting people it is not funny

[petronia.livejournal.com]

I tried it with, like, Hisagi Shuuhei! And Gin! And Matsumoto and Hitsugaya. But Urahara is the one who makes the most sense. Um, except for the part where Soi Fong impregnates Yoruichi, but you can't claim it's not FUNNY.

DOUJINSHI FOR TEH WIN

[woodburner.livejournal.com]

oh god that whole thread is one of the best threads on the internet o_o

[vonbrigthi.livejournal.com]

Ten pesos that somewhere out there in dj land, this has already been done to some effect. DX Also, I think you need to stop reading all those Chinese fics... Though then again, the English fandom is pretty cracktastic too.

I'll be in that cave over there now.

(Effect? affect? I give up.)

(Gin... Gin would work if Aizen was also in there somewhere, being puppet master or something.)

(... NOOOOOOOOOO.)

[motorbike.livejournal.com]

YOU ARE MY HERO. PLEASE DO ME NOW.

I like that you upped the stakes by adding Homosexuals.

ALSO! This name switch-around is SO MUCH CLASSIER. Though Urahara and Yoruichi are never ever married, even in crack. Also Byakuya must always get a bullet, THIS IS WHERE YOUR MONEY WILL COME FROM post-Pulitzer.

[vonbrigthi.livejournal.com]

... now my brain is NEVER coming home. ;_;

Shetland pony.

[saturnoolaa.livejournal.com]

The best thing about Trapped in the Closet: the only version I have actually ever seen was acted out by people from The Sims 2.

[serendip.livejournal.com]

Eh. SO YOU WALK THE WALK BUT CAN YOU TALK THE TALK? XD Write it and then leave j00r fandom, plz XD

[serendip.livejournal.com]

Rukia can't help being uh dominant. XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

[dipping_sauce]

...

*hits Sabina with fan*

[naanima.livejournal.com]

...

I am finally happy with the world.

[autophanous.livejournal.com]

--you are both brilliant and fantastically amusing.

May I add you?

[petronia.livejournal.com]

Sure, no prob. ^^