my condolences - this must be very difficult for you.
in one of my many attempts to grok confucianism i sat down with the book of rites and very quickly discovered that significant parts of it are thought experiments on a theme of "what is the protocol when a dear relative dies on [significant day]?" the content would move onto something different and then in the next lot of assorted questions it was as if some nagging thought had just occurred to the writer-- "but, wait! what is the protocol when the bride's father dies after she has left her natal house but before the marriage ceremony is finished?" (iirc, if she is on the road, she must turn around and go back home to mourn; but if the marriage ceremony is taking place then she must stay, as this is her house now)
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Date: 2012-01-23 01:37 am (UTC)in one of my many attempts to grok confucianism i sat down with the book of rites and very quickly discovered that significant parts of it are thought experiments on a theme of "what is the protocol when a dear relative dies on [significant day]?" the content would move onto something different and then in the next lot of assorted questions it was as if some nagging thought had just occurred to the writer-- "but, wait! what is the protocol when the bride's father dies after she has left her natal house but before the marriage ceremony is finished?" (iirc, if she is on the road, she must turn around and go back home to mourn; but if the marriage ceremony is taking place then she must stay, as this is her house now)